Religion

I don't define myself through any beliefs but why do other people feel the need to tell you about theirs? as if converting me is going to bring them some sort of satisfaction? Jehovah's witnesses for example. Coming to tell us about your religion is all very well and good but what happens if I were to just say yeah OK, I'm sold, sign me up! What happens then? ..the short answer they'd just explode on your doorstep. I attended an Islamophobia conference recently and watched 8 religious people sit and argue about something that i wasn't really bothered about. My point is, if everyone kept their religious views in their head rather than feeling the need to shout it about, the world would be a nicer place. We probably wouldn't be having the wars in different countries. We wouldn't have had to live through the tragedies of 9/11 and the 7/7 train bombings. People wouldn't have these tiny little insignificant squabbles with each other about whether there is or isn't a god? or what this god has told them to do? Or how he's trying to make the world a better place. I mean if it wasn't for beliefs a lot of famous religious leaders would have lived long happy lives.. and probably wouldn't have been famous for that matter. Martin Luther King? Saddam Hussain? Jesus? all just dwelling in their own homes, comfortable that they know what they believe and not caring what others think. It seems to me people needing to express their beliefs is actually making this world a worse place. I hope it's not just me but can't people be happy within themselves about their beliefs and not have to destroy the world in an attempt to prove that they might or might not be right because we are never going to know.

Everyone's got that "genious" friend

"Omg I'm a genious, I figured out how the periodic table works"  were the words that my friend wrote on her chemistry folder when she thought she'd out smarted the world. If you haven't noticed an issue with that sentence (even with a hint from the title) you should probably go to school more often. Everyone makes these mistakes, but some more than others. It's not a massive issue spellig and gramar. However it can be the difference between getting a job on a local newspaper or...working at the range for the rest of my life..as a random example. It's not only quite funny it's also extremely frustrating watching someone ruining their page with these tiny little details which is why I'm never becoming a teacher. Ps. I'm not really this stuck up in person.

Wheezing

Laughing is a vital part of life. It makes you feel good and without laughing it would be a very sad world. But some people don't laugh anymore. Like me, they wheeze. It's like laughing hysterically but under your breath. Without trying to sound like a sad case, my friends took the mickey out of me at school for it and it has scarred me ever since. Sometimes i physically try to laugh to avoid wheezing but it can't be avoided and it's becoming common. Now I notice quite a few people doing "the wheeze" as it's better known and it makes me wonder if people just can't help it or more likely, I started a trend, because of my celebrity status.

Home Alone

Being home alone is nothing like the movie says it is. When I first came home to an empty house, I thought yes! no annoying parents, no sister to cry her way into the run of the television!. However it was only after I'd grown out of babysitting, I realised...I haven't grown out of babysitting?!. For the hour I was alone after I got home from school that day, I was absolutely bricking it. Every noise was another flinch and for that whole hour i didn't move out of that spot on the sofa. I was scared, without any hassle, never mind with some lunatic trying to break in. Now the movie says that if you're getting burgled, as long as you've got a 12 year old child in the house with unlimited tools, your house is safe. I don't know about you but the first place I was going if the house was burgled that day, or any other day for that matter, is out the nearest exit (if the exits are blocked I'm going for my baseball bat). As opposed to Macaulay Culkin who would ready himself with the nearest blowtorch (obviously). Call me a coward but I'd rather live.

Showering

Remember the days when you were a child and you used to have a weekly bath on a sunday night (if you don't then that's awkward). But now I'm all grown up, I realise that you have to wash more often than the statutory once a week and you now have to do it standing up because working class people have busy lives and baths take too long. However, have you ever been in the shower on a crisp monday morning, it's lovely and warm and you've been in for a good teen minutes so you decide to close your eyes so that when you wash your hair the shampoo doesn't permanently blind you. Well it's this moment that I realise I've made a mistake and start to think, what if, when I open my eyes someone is there in the shower with me?!. I'm not joking I stood in the shower with my eyes closed for a good 5 minutes after I'd washed my hair thinking when the best time to open my eyes was. If there was a person/monster there with me I'd probably have a heart attack when I opened my eyes to their face, so i've now resided to having to turn to face a wall so i'm sure no one is there when I open my eyes....I hate Showers

Justin Bieber

Why do some people hate him? He has a pretty good voice and a lot of money. I suppose I can't really judge on his personality because I've never met him, and neither have quite a big proportion of the rest of the world. I used to be a Bieber hater until I asked myself why? and I couldn't find a reason and I'm pretty sure most of you probably couldn't either. I'm not saying Bieber is a saint but until you've met him and seen if he actually is annoying the only reason you could hate him is out of jealousy.

Video Games

I consider myself an immature geek, but only when people aren't around obviously. On the topic my favourite kind of geeks are the ones that think no one can see them when really there's about 12 people watching them pick their nose. Fortunately I make sure no one is around when I do that... But my geeky collection of weird traits include:

-Dancing around like a retarded monkey
-making weird faces and noises
-picking at my face/beard (which I call a beard but is really blonde stubble)
-asking random questions in lectures so I can answer them myself
-eating ridiculously fast and thinking it's cool

and so on and so on. But i think my worst geeky trait is video games. I get so annoyed by Fifa to a point where I'm actually punching the chair I'm sitting on. I don't do a great deal to hide this to my family as they hear me getting annoyed from downstairs, usually asking in a concerned voice  "what was that?" and getting a disgruntled "nothing" in reply.

However I do my best to hide it from my friends. What really happens when they kill me or beat me, it's eating me alive inside. I think it has something to do with being a really bad loser. Whenever I used to play real games of football, if the other team scored I would fake an injury so I had a reason to explain losing other than that we were just really bad. (We lost practically every game that season). I have got better at channeling this since I got older but I would like to think that all video gamers are the same as me. This would be out of hope more than expectation but besides video gaming I think everyone needs to admit they have a geeky side or you will just look like you're actually weird when it comes round to the nose picking.